I’m waiting – A Love Letter

Dear Sakkarai Pongal,

You might not know me and that is entirely my fault. I’m writing this letter hoping it would find you and possibly make you want to meet me. You’re wondering right now, where I must’ve met you. I’ll tell you that. I remember like it happened yesterday.

Yesterday, I was at the Durga temple with my parents. We were all waiting in line for the temple priest to open the screen and grant us darshan of the goddess. But I got darshan of my goddess before everyone else. It was you. I know that was a bit cheesy, but it is my first time falling in love and I could draw inspiration only from cheesy movies. So bear with me. Where were we? Yes, I saw you. You were in line, a few people before me. As the rest of the crowd was busy talking with each other or fiddling with their phones, you had your eyes closed. Your lips whispered sincere prayers that pulled me into a trance. The cacophony of the horde faded out as I listened intently to your every breath. The moment was perfect and I didn’t dare to break it so I decided against coming over and talking to you. So I decided to wait.

Was that the reason you didn’t get to know me? Certainly not. After we had our darshan of the goddess, I tried to make my way to you to introduce myself. That’s when I heard an aunty in the crowd say “Good thing we were able to see the raahu kaala poojai”. Now how could I bring myself to start this once-in-a-lifetime relationship during rahu kaalam? So I decided to wait.

Was that the reason you ask? Not at all. Rahu kaalam did end and we both were still in the temple. You were now praying to Lord Hanuman. I too joined in and prayed to the bachelor god to help me with my love. As a response to my prayers, the temple bells started tolling. Taking it as a sign, I inched towards you. You were still in prayer with your eyes closed and that gave me the courage to speak out since I wouldn’t lose myself in your eyes. Standing there near you, I blurted out a quick hello and asked your name, all the while not daring to take my eyes off the floor. I waited for your reply, thinking that they sure were tolling the bells for a long time. Getting no reply I lifted my head and saw you still deep in your prayers. You hardly heard a word I said over the sound of the bells. The people around us were snickering at the sight of me making a fool of myself, so I ran away from there before you opened your eyes. Our meeting should be nothing less than perfect. So I decided to wait.

Again, was the humiliation the reason? You were worth it and I wasn’t going to let that stop me. But it did take me some time to find you again. But find you I did, and this time you were giving people prasadham. You probably had a venduthal, a promise of offering, and you were fulfilling it. Anyways, meeting you and getting prasadham from you while I’m at it? Couldn’t ask for more. I joined the line for the prasadham and as I was nearing you I kept practicing in my mind how I would introduce myself. Surely, in all those scenarios you were swept off your feet by my boyish charm and we both ride into the sunset a happy couple. You were in my arms and as I showered you with kisses, you kept calling me “Yennanga! Yennanga!” Ah! It was bliss until you started shouting “Yennanga! Prasadham!”  I was so lost in my thought that I failed to realize I was standing right beside you and you were calling me out to take the prasadham from you. Then the crowd yelled out a collective “Yov”. I was shaken from my stupor and all I could manage was give you a sheepish smile as I took the sakkarai Pongal from your hands. Before I could open my mouth to say something, the crowd pushed me out. I couldn’t get back in. It was time for us to leave so I reluctantly bid you farewell from afar, praying to the fates to make us meet someday.

By now you must’ve realized that this was the reason and probably think maybe we just weren’t meant to be. But my dear sakkarai Pongal, I have news for you. The fates answered my prayers when we visited another temple in the evening and lo and behold! there you were handing out prasadham again. You certainly must’ve had a very big venduthal to distribute prasadham in all the temples in that area. This was all the sign I needed from the universe. Nothing was going to stop me now. I was about to walk towards you when I heard my mom point out excitedly to my dad, “Look! It is the same girl from the morning we saw at the other temple”. Oh mom! Isn’t she awesome? I thought to myself when I heard my dad say, “Yeah! The same girl our son was gawking at all morning!” I turned around shocked to look at my parents smiling at me sarcastically. The game was up. I didn’t even know if they were for or against me talking to you, but the fact that they knew my intentions drained all the enthusiasm I had built inside. I became very self-aware and couldn’t bring myself to even steal a glance towards you. I spent all day yesterday mulling over how stupid I was.

And that dear, is the reason you didn’t get to meet me. But hey! It is never too late right? I realized today is Valentine’s Day and maybe that was why the universe made me wait. What better day to let you know my feelings? The only problem was, I don’t know your name nor where you lived. So, I came up with this ingenious idea to write this letter in my blog. Hoping against all odds that it will reach you. So if you are the girl who was at the Durga temple and Shiva temple, then I’ll be waiting for you in the Shiva temple every day from now on in the evenings until you come find me. I’ve decided to wait.

Love,

Me

P.S. This letter was written as part of “Write a love letter” campaign by Chennai Bloggers Club. But if any girl did love my letter then come find me at the same temple. I’ll be waiting 🙂

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